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Tips for the Groom on Choosing His Attendants

While the bride has her bridesmaids and maid of honor, the groom will have his best man and groomsmen. Sometimes the choice may be obvious for the best man, usually a cousin, a brother or a best buddy. However, due to the list of tasks and responsibilities bestowed upon the best man, it may be wise to select exercise some thought into making a choice for this role. While the obvious responsibilities of the best man include bringing the rings and giving a toast during the reception, in reality he has a string of other duties and preparations to be responsible for prior to the wedding.

Some Basic Rules

For instance, he has to be at least 18 years of age to sign the legal documents for the wedding, he is responsible for making hotel and dinner arrangements for the couple, he makes transportation arrangements throughout the wedding, he has to work with the usher's on their duties during the wedding, he ensures that all the guests from out of town have the proper accommodation during the wedding and finally, he is the one in charge of all the groomsmen tuxes. What's more, he is also the one that will gather the rest of the groomsmen to plan a bachelor party for the groom and would be driving the couple to during their wedding day. As such, if your best man is not up to the task, has a problem with handling responsibility or is just plan too busy with other personal tasks, then perhaps the most obvious people would not be the best person for the role.

Defining the responsibilities for a best man

In this case, if you feel that your brother or best friend may not be the right person, you may want to consider others who are more ready to take up the responsibility. Be careful not to hurt the feelings of those who may think that you will pick them as your best man, and take the time to explain to them the huge amount of time and responsibility involved. Of course, brothers always have the advantage of being the first in line as a best man and it may not be wise to write them off just yet. Tell them the list of tasks that need to be done and have a one-on-one discussion with them to determine if they are up for the job. Obviously, he will be expected to be punctual for the rehearsals and the preparations, and he would also be expected to be reliable and calm amidst the pressure. Also, he would need to be sober enough to prepare a memorable and suitable best man's speech during the reception.

Thus, with mutual understanding on the responsibilities involved, your best man needs to be ready to put his time and commitment into this. If he agrees and are ready for this, then you are well on your way on getting the best man that you expect for your wedding.

Picking your buddies as your groomsmen

With only one guy as your best man, you probably have a bunch of other buddies that you could get as your groomsmen. There isn't much of a limit on the number of groomsmen you can have, but as a rule of thumb, there should be one groomsman for every 50 guests. This will ensure that you won't have too many groomsmen for a smaller wedding, and too few groomsmen for a large wedding.

It is the norm for groomsmen to have more fun than responsibilities for the wedding. Nevertheless however, they will still need to do some work during the wedding, such as greeting and seating the guests, be present for to try out the tuxes, help the wedding couple and the best man with wedding gifts and decorations, attend the wedding rehearsal and probably the most interesting, plan and attend the bachelor party with the best man.

With this, it is always your prerogative to pick the right people who will work together with you in order to make the wedding an unforgettable event especially for the bride. In this sense, the shortcomings of your attendants would truly disrupt and affect the flow of the wedding. Therefore, it is best that all your attendants have a complete understanding on their roles and play their parts in helping you make your wedding a great success.